Recovery

Saturday, August 27

Today has been an exceedingly slow day – one of those familiar days over the last four months. I just cannot seem to catapult myself out of this dragging state. My meager work out was a 1 1/2 hour morning walk with Laurie. Numerous times she turned back up the hill to accompany me down the other side – a truly sad state of affairs.

Fatigue has surely been a reoccurring theme throughout this blog. So today I asked myself why I felt so physically drained, tired and exhausted. I sought an honest answer. One might suggest the cumulative effect of chemotherapy or drugs robbing me of my testosterone or numerous other cancer related causes. Perhaps a case for age could be made or simply being ‘out of shape’.

NO, I think not!

I recall the people, places and events of the last two weeks. Piper, the 13-month toddler, clearly stands out. She stands out because I now realize we share the exact same condition (as some of you surely do). I call it:  FMO – Fear of Missing Out!

I rehearse in my head the litany of physical and social activities in which I gleefully participated. The days (and evenings) were just packed full of fun things!  I did not want to pass on any of them. They just kept coming at me and I embraced them all because they were with people whom I wanted to play, share and make memories. I, like Piper, did not want to miss one solitary adventure. Whether it was a bike ride, hike, pool time, ice cream store foray, card game or whatever (and whenever) I just did not want to miss out.

So no wonder, after all the family finally exited yesterday, my body hit the wall. I crashed! I was done! I was paying the price of unabashed fun and endless playtime – just like the kids do now and I had done as a kid myself.

I now realize: Not too bad a price to pay for the reward of memories.

Thank you all!